Saturday, October 17, 2009

Stimulus Please--Obama's Stash Part 2

Dear President Obama:

I was so happy to see that $16 billion of the $800+ billion (or is it trillion? all those zeros confuse me) February stimulus package has been spent. And 30,383 jobs were created/saved. Wowie. That means that each job created/saved only cost $526,610.00. You guys sure must be working hard spending all that money.

Not to be presumptuous or anything but I think I can help. While you all are writing checks I was wondering if you could write one to me for $263,305.00 (that's half the amount you are spending to save/create a job in Washington) and I promise to create/save a job (maybe two!) in California. We're having a tough time out here. You see our unemployment rate is 12.2%, higher than the rest of the country because we have been spending much more than we take in for decades now.

Well, anyway, I sure could use some help cleaning my house. It's back-breaking work and it never seems to end. And, well, I was just thinking, if health care is a right and all, maybe in addition to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness, I might be entitled to a clean house?

What do ya think, Mr. President? By taking out all the middlemen in Washington, I can save/create one job for half the price! Just $263,305.00. A bargain, huh?

Thanks so much, Mr. O. Like those women in Detroit I was just thinking maybe I could get my hands on some of your "Obama stash." (Where did you get all that money anyway? You must be a very smart man.)

Respectfully yours.

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